Said A Man

Not all men are trash. I am a single father and I have earned my seat at the “there are still good men out there” conference.

I’ve been looking at my daughter growing up; she’s grown into a beautiful young lady. She reminds me of the day I met her mother. She was short, thick; small splendid eyes, an exquisite smile and that lazy walk. They are so much alike. I don’t know what went wrong with her mother. She just left. She left us without saying goodbye. I was left by myself to raise a three-year-old by myself. No one ever gives credit to single fathers. I loved my wife, I still do, you would swear that we were born for each other. Like she was born to be with me and I was born to be with her, we were inseparable

. I was insanely smitten. We all make mistakes. I would throw a few punches once in a while. I did it out of love. Ngesizulu kuthiwa ligotshwa lisemanzi. I was taught to solve my problems by using my fists like a man, my father did it, his father did and that has never ended any marriage. On the good days, she made me feel like a real man, made sure I was fed, made sure I always had clean underwear, listen, I was taken care of. Up until she changed, I do not know what went wrong with her, her spark was gone, her smile faded and the fights became a constant thing and to top it all of she just gave up in life. She gave her life to the brewery, started worshiping friends and she forgot about me, about us, the little girl that needed her mother the most. She loved our daughter, dearly; I have no doubts about that. Sometimes uSathane uvele aziphe amandla and we all know that women aren’t as strong as us men. My home was cold and lonely after she left, I had no one to talk to, and I cried myself to sleep for weeks, trying to figure out what went wrong. You want to know how I ended up here? Well…One evening my daughter got sick, she got really sick, I had to take care of her like a responsible father that I am. She wasn’t getting any better, she had some kind of fever. So the next morning I decided to take her to hospital, when I opened her blankets I realized that there was a lot of blood on her sheets, she just got her periods, she was too weak to clean up the mess. Again as a responsible father, I decided that I was going to bathe her before I drive her to the hospital, take care of my little girl. I hadn’t realized that she has grown this much. She was a young woman. When I took off her clothes. . . I was surprised by what I saw, her body so firm and beautifully molded. I looked into my daughter’s eyes, they were so weak, she was so helpless, God, did I mention that she was so beautiful? She turned me on. I got distracted by her naked body, I was reminded of the first time her mother and I made love. I had never in my life seen a body so beautiful. I was taken aback to a time when her mother was still her age (he laughs) she was so terrified when we made love for the first time. We kissed, I remember kissing her neck, kissing her all the way to her boobs as I was undressing her. “I am not ready, please stop,” she said with a soft voice. I could tell that she wanted it, she was just scared. “Shhh,” I said, “it won’t hurt for too long, it will be over in no time”. We made love, it was so beautiful. Hai no, she just laid there stiff as a frozen chicken (he laughs again) but still it was beautiful. She cried, she cried tears of joy. Tears of joy because that day l made her a woman, l gave her the best form of love there is. I fell in love all over again. She looked into my eyes and cried a silent cry. Mxm well back to my daughter It was déjà vu because my daughter laid there on that bed naked and helpless, I hadn’t realized that I took off all her clothes already. She was crying, she kept on saying “how could you? I trusted you” l think she was hallucinating. A few minutes later her eyes changed, she couldn’t breathe, I had to rush her to hospital, I didn’t even get a chance to bathe her, she was getting worse. As a responsible father, I made sure that she gets the best treatment there is. I didn’t want to lose her, I’ve already lost her mother. I would never do anything to hurt my little angel. Never. I was later accused of rape, raping my own daughter. How sick is that? Who in their right mind does that? I did nothing wrong, I swear, we both wanted it to happen, she didn’t say “NO”. I got twelve years in prison for being a loving father. You said you are in here for arm robbery and attempted murder, that’s a crime, you are guilty, you deserve to be here. I did nothing wrong, I did nothing wrong. I should’ve left her to die if I knew I would end up here. She is bitter and spiteful just like her mother. No one ever says this but women are trash too. “You can’t keep a good man down” a wise man once